fouldsy.com

In light of the Government’s re-think of what to call thugs and yobs and how they should be ‘suitably’ punished, The Register, always a good one for giving the middle finger to authority and saying what everyone is thinking but doesn’t dare say, came up with this gem:

Police officer: “Oi, get out of your neighbour’s car and stop smoking that dope, you little sh*t.”
Teen tearaway: “I ain’t no little sh*t copper, cos the ‘ome office says so. I’m an anti-social behaviour practitioner and me solicitor will have yer a*** for this slanderous outrage.”
Police officer: “I do most sincerely apologise. Would you desist from your anti-social practices forthwith and accompany me to the nearest police station where counselling will be made immediately available?”
Teen tearaway: “Yeah, OK, as long as I get to drive.”

If only the fact that it’s so worringly true wasn’t what’s so funny…

I’m after one of them, so if anyone else wants the other one, let me know. No hagglers please, and I’m sure the dealer would prefer not to have to count through a load of copper coins (this means you, Mr Anderson).

And Seb, maybe this is something you could get as a replacement for your scooter. You never know, they might do a trade-in, so long as you have some of your pocket money from this week left over to make up the difference…

Oh, and I don’t think they’re available for a test drive, but from what I hear they’re not bad cars. Suppose you’d still be taking a chance mind…

But it’s still funny:

It appears that the field trials mentioned previously in an unknown area of the country are going well. The main benefits would appear to less pollution, however this does not appear to be the cause. Our field reporter who managed to capture this amazing shot claimed “I heard it before I saw it. It was unmistakable. Nothing sounds quite like it apart from a hairdryer, and I knew that a hairdryer couldn’t be that loud and certainly not travelling down the road.” Asked whether the trials appeared to be going well, our reported commented “Well, for something with less power than a sowing-machine, I would say it was a success. The monkey certainly seemed happy.” More on this story as it happens folks…

Back again, it’s the latest and greatest episode of the BOFH – http://www.theregister.co.uk/2004/07/06/bofh_2004_episode_22/. Anyone for toast?

Well, managed to completely annihilate the webserver last night trying to run some new scripts which required some Perl components to be manually updated. Didn’t exactly go to plan and I ended up causing more trouble than was worth. Every step I took to correct things just seemed to break more libraries + components. Ah well, all fixed now and back up and running.
I do like the prompt under Debian when you try to remove perl-base and it asks you type in something along the lines of “Bugger off, I know what I’m doing!” (or not…). One of the few times shouting at a computer actually works…

My informants have slipped me some information, top secret of course, with regards to the latest Government plan to help reduce pollution from cars and other such evil forms of transport. Hopefully, we’ll have an interview shortly with the mastermind behind the pilot scheme reportedly taking place somewhere in the North East of England, but for now here’s the long awaited tranport method an agent under the codename of ‘Seb’ is field-testing. As soon as reports are confirmed, we shall mock some more.

Well, at least two idiots made some comments…
Firstly, for a man who’s website is soley about bunnies and how he pulled out a load of bricks in his house without ripping a load-bearing wall out at the same time and wants to brag about it, check out www.women.com. Am sure you’ll love it.
And Seb, if yer still gettin the bus into work, at least you’re not going to be among the crowd with their cars at www.barryboys.co.uk. Your kinda motors I do believe.

Enjoy fellas! And don’t work too hard, eh?

Well, went to the pet shop to get some fish food, and ended up lookin at the guinea pigs + bunny rabbits with Lindsey. We’d just decided to get (another) one, when the shop assistant picked her up for someone else. Lindsey was really upset, but we decided to go to the pet store down in Durham to have a look, definately looking at either another bunny or guinea pig. And we fell in love straight away with a gorgeous cross lop-eared dwarf (check out the photo below!). Will start introducing her to Milly + Kay soon, though am sure they’ll all get along alright!

Spent close to 2 hours last night trying to setup port forwarding on the Origo ADSL 8100 modem to get the site up and running from the outside world. No matter I did, it kept putting me through to the router admin page, even when I changed the ports it ran and disallowed my internal LAN address from accessing it via the Net. Couldn’t work out why it wouldn’t let me through. Finally, ran through www.the-cloak.com just as an out-of-interest test and sure enough it then forwarded me through to the webserver. Quite why this stupid little excuse for a router always puts you to the admin page from the internal LAN is beyond me, so to anyone struggling to work out why their port forwarding doesn’t work when they know it’s setup right, don’t worry, it probably is working!